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>> Champagne-ArdenneChampagne-Ardenne Property Guide
Champagne-Ardenne is famous throughout the world as France's number one
producer of alfalfa. Alfalfa is widely held to be a galactagogue (a
substance that promotes lactation.) It is also known to reduce fertility
in sheep. Some ewes have been known to take advantage of this, resulting
in greater promiscuity and a general lowering of moral standards in the
sheep population. Frequently though, the alfalfa also makes them lactate
furiously, thereby limiting their scope for recreational sex. Alfalfa
also features in Joseph Heller's novel 'Catch 22'. Major Major's father
receives a government subsidy for every strip of land he doesn't grow
alfalfa on. He uses the subsidy to buy more land not to grow alfalfa on.
The production of sparkling wine in Champagne nearly ended 100 years
ago, when the phylloxera louse developed a taste for the local vines.
The louse is a native of North America, and it's thought the original
mating pair were from Maryland and may have been honeymooning in Europe
when they discovered Champagne's vines and decided to settle. Phylloxera
belong to the suborder Sternorrhyncha, which means their mouthparts are
towards the back of the head. This enables them to binge without anyone
noticing. They are also sexually dimorphic, which just means that the
males are different from the females. Well duh. An extreme example of
sexual dimorphism is the Osedax worm. The females live off the bones of
dead whales, while the males live inside the females and don't develop
past the larval stage, except to produce vast amounts of sperm. They
also spend most of the day in their room playing loud music. With
Bonellia viridis, by contrast, the female swallows the males, who then
live inside her genital sac. Ding dong! But I digress. Champagne's
grape-growers reacted swiftly to the crisis and buried a toad under each
vine. Phylloxera are notoriously squeamish about toads.
In the cathedral at Troyes, Louis the Stammerer (see our guide to
Alsace) was sworn in as Emperor in 878. The ceremony took longer than
expected. Today, Troyes is home to the Lacoste © brand. Created by
1920's French tennis star René Lacoste, the famous shirts were marketed
in the US as "The status symbol of the competent sportsman". In the UK,
the slogan was "Never mind, Tim, at least they'll keep you warm". The
stunning medieval city of Troyes is twinned with Chesterfield in the UK,
which has the edge, at least where sofas are concerned. Troyes was the birthplace of Émile Coué, pharmacist and hypnotist, remembered for "Every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better", which he did, until his death in 1926. Coué advocated optimistic autosuggestion, by which, "Any idea exclusively occupying the mind turns into reality." I'm therefore concentrating exclusively on the thought that these articles are getting better. If Coué was right, they will. The same can work for you too - these regional guides will SEEM to be getting better. Just believe.
© 2008 richardheacock @ mac.com
Champagne-Ardenne LocationChampagne-Ardenne is located in north-east of France.
At its northern tip it is bordered by Belgium, and down the east side by the
French regions of Lorraine and a small area of France-Comte. On the southern and
western borders it is flanked by Burgundy and further north by Ile-de-France and
Picardy. The region is split into 4 departments: Aube, Ardennes, Haute-Marne and
Marne. Champagne-Ardenne LandscapeIt is known for its rolling landscapes,
large forests and many rivers, lakes and streams. The north of the region is
dominated by the abundant Ardennes forests. Its rivers, all of which flow west,
include the Seine, the Marne, and the Aisne. Champagne-Ardenne AttractionsThere are 8 lakes reserved for tourists, including
the Lac du Der-Chantecoq, the largest man-made lake in Europe! Champagne-Ardenne WeatherChampagne-Ardenne is a region to enjoy all the seasons.
Although it can be cold during winter with temperatures around zero, the summer
is pleasantly warm with temperatures in the mid-twenties degrees centigrade and
on average 6 to 8 hours of sunshine. In such a green area it is not surprising
that you cannot avoid some rainy days! Getting thereThe region has three autoroutes:
Champagne-Ardenne populationAbout 1.3 million inhabitants - so it is one of France's
least populated areas. Major Towns/CitiesThe major towns are:
Champagne-Ardenne Prices
Outside the major towns, rural prices are as cheap as they get in France! More Champagne Ardenne articles << Click here
Champagne - Ardenne Property Selection
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